Divorce & Freedom: Women Don’t Need Men to Survive Anymore

Divorcing my Spanish husband to be HAPPY SINGLE versus MISERABLE MARRIED was the best decision of my life.

I was 22 and living in Barcelona when we met. I thought I was in love when we married but I didn’t really know him and learned too late what life would be like by his side. Everything I was – the independent, free spirit from California who met a boy while backpacking Spain – was ripped away by a man who valued control & dominance above all else.

As a WIFE, my freedom was lost.

It took 4 years to realise my mistake. I left him at 26, when my daughter was one. And while I detest that man who never paid child support and who mentally & physically abused me and my daughter for decades, I am forever grateful for the love of my life – my daughter.

As she grew, we lived in 3 countries before she left for uni (Spain, U.S. & India) and we travelled 4 continents together, just me and her.

Being a single mom was wonderful, the best part of me – and something I very much miss identifying as. And I was a better parent single than I ever would have been as an unhappy wife.

WHY I WROTE THIS
I’ve been thinking lately about freedom & women’s rights. So much “out of our control” actually CONTROLS one’s personal freedom, like where we’re born & the family we’re born into.

I didn’t perceive it at the time, but as a young woman, freedom was a luxury I took for granted. I was taught that I was equal and could do anything a boy could. Then, embarrassingly, let myself be controlled by a husband before remembering I wasn’t his to control and that I could provide for myself.

Women don’t NEED men to survive anymore, there are 1,000s of ways to earn money. In 2026, there is also no shame in being unmarried, divorced, or a single mom. We are capable and deserve to live our dreams, too.

Please NEVER stay in a miserable situation out of duty – stay only for your heart’s desire (and yes, that reason may not always be love but it also shouldn’t be fear or – like me – being made small). You’ll be missing out on an exceptional life built on a foundation of self-worth & personal motivation … and full of immeasurable joy ❤️